Done

 This is such an arduous process! I WILL  get thru this ...with Gods guidance :)

After a substantial amount of no contact, I cracked a window of communication. Felt it necessary for closure. Though it did open old wounds, in the end  it brought closure....AND confirmed My decision. That was the last time I will ever allow him to hurt me. I am worthy , I am worthy, I am WORTHY ...of a man to love and respect me and put me before him. To be there for me when i fall and pick me up.  To respect and honor my differences. To hurt when I hurt and go thru great measures to help me feel better. To cherish me, encourage me and  Celebrate my accomplishments. A man who will walk by my side and help me along the journey. Not wrap his body around my legs pulling me down with him. A man who will let me be a women and Hold me when I am weak. A man with integrity who does the right thing... What ever the cost.  A man whos words MATCH his actions. A man that tells me the truth and I don't have to worry he is scamming me, as he does the world. A man who can see he is tearing me down, because he is looking at me, and not at himself. 

He didnt see me. My deep love,  my strength,  my creativity,  my passion for life. He didnt see my kindness and great compassion for others. He didnt see  my struggle to keep us together, my commitment to him year after year. He didnt see my broken soul and heavy heart. He didnt see me .... Because HE CHOSE .... to look the other way....

                                                                           Im done.